Your Speech Starts Before You Speak
I went to UC Santa Barbara undeclared and graduated with two degrees - one in business economics and the other in dramatic arts.
Before college, theater wasn’t even on my radar. In fact, I’m not sure I’d ever seen a play before. But a random class selection (thanks, Mom!) threw me into the world of dramatic arts, and I was hooked.
I fell in love with live performance - the interaction between a stage, actors, and an audience.
Through years of experience as a theater actor, emcee, global keynote speaker, educator, speaker coach, and content creator, I’ve learned that communication is full of small, nuanced elements that make a big impact. And one of the most important lessons I’ve discovered is this:
Your speech starts long before you say your first word.
The Invisible Curtain
In the theater, there’s a curtain - a physical barrier that hides the actors before the show begins. It protects the illusion, ensuring that the audience sees exactly what the director wants them to see.
Now, imagine there’s no curtain. Instead, actors shuffle onto the stage, chatting, adjusting their costumes, and yawning before they slip into character. The magic would be lost. The audience wouldn’t be drawn into the story because they’d already seen too much.
Public speaking works the same way. When you step up to speak - whether it’s a startup pitch, a keynote, or a wedding toast - there’s no physical curtain to shield you. Your audience begins forming an impression the moment they lay eyes on you.
And that’s where many speakers go wrong without even knowing something went wrong!
Your Energy Starts Before Your Words
Think about the last time you saw a speaker who didn’t command the stage. Maybe they strolled up hesitantly, eyes down, shoulders slumped. Maybe they fumbled with their notes, adjusted the microphone, or exhaled loudly before forcing a smile and beginning.
At that point, they’ve already lost their audience.
Most people don’t realize it, but our brains are wired to make snap judgments. Studies show that first impressions form in milliseconds, even before a single word is spoken. The way you walk, your facial expression, and your body language all communicate something before you open your mouth.
When a speaker approaches the stage with low energy or uncertainty, the audience mirrors that energy. Instead of being excited to listen, they tune out before the talk even begins.
But the good news? You can flip that first impression in your favor - before you even say a word.
Own the Moment (Before You Speak)
Your movement sets the tone. If you wander to the stage like you’re walking into a dentist’s office, that’s the energy your audience will feel. Instead, move with intention. Walk tall, shoulders back, and make eye contact with the room. A slight hustle in your step, even a little jog, can instantly add energy to your presence. Let your personality do the speaking with how you make it to the stage.
And while you’re at it, make sure your clothing is in check. Are your shirt and jacket tucked in? Are your pockets free of jingling keys? Are your shoelaces tied tightly? The last thing you want is for your first impression to be you adjusting your outfit on stage.
If the event allows it, ask if you can have a walk-on song. Music is a powerful way to set the stage for your talk and create anticipation. Your choice of song can reflect the mood you want to establish - whether it’s high energy, motivational, or even humorous. Walking up to music can also help you shake off nerves and step into the moment with confidence.
A warm, genuine smile before you speak disarms the audience. It sets a positive tone and makes you more approachable. Ever notice how great performers smile before they even start their performance? They know that energy is contagious. It is like a tide, and you have control of it.
Your audience will be impacted by what they see - if you look nervous, they’ll feel nervous for you.
If you look excited, they’ll feel that excitement too.
Your posture speaks louder than your words. If you stand hunched or fidget, you appear unsure. If you stand tall, take up space, and move with purpose, you exude confidence. Avoid crossing your arms or hiding behind a podium - let your body language work for you, not against you.
A great trick?
Shake out your nerves before anyone sees you.
Panels, Q&As, and Impromptu Moments
This concept applies far beyond the keynote stage. Even if you’re on a panel, your talk starts before your first question.
It’s easy to zone out while waiting for your turn, but don’t make that mistake. The audience sees you before you speak. If you’re disengaged, looking down at your phone, or zoning out, they’ve already decided you’re not worth listening to.
Instead, be present and engaged. Show that you’re listening by nodding, smiling, and reacting to what others are saying. Your body language should indicate that you’re part of the conversation, not just a passive participant.
The same applies if you’re asking a question in a Q&A. People are looking at you, even if only for a few seconds. A well-asked question can spark connections and make people remember you long after the event. The way you carry yourself, even in that brief moment, can leave an impression on speakers, panelists, and other attendees who may want to connect with you later.
At events like weddings or community gatherings, there’s often no backstage to prepare. That’s okay. Instead of nervously flipping through notes, be present in the moment.
The real preparation happens well before this moment - now is the time to enjoy it.
Virtual Speaking and Social Media: The Curtain is Your Camera
The same principles hold true for virtual speaking and social media videos.
Your “curtain” online is your video. If you need to adjust something or get ready, turn your video off until you’re prepared. But ideally, log in, video on, ready to go.
If you do choose to be off video, don’t underestimate the importance of the image that shows when you are off video. Is it a high-quality photo of you, sharing the impression you want? Does it show your personality?
Mine sure does. If you ever see it, you will know why.
If you have no image, then you are not giving people anything to go on.
Just like in person, your audience will make a judgment about you before you speak. If you’re distracted, looking away, or slouched in your chair, that’s what they’ll notice first. Instead, be attentive, engaged, and camera-ready the moment you’re introduced.
And if you’re recording a video for social media, the same principle applies. You want the video to start when you are ready to start. You don’t see content creators leaving in the few seconds of them adjusting their camera, fixing their hair, or taking a deep breath before they speak. They cut straight to the action.
When creating content, you can edit those first few moments out so you start exactly where you want - intentional, engaging, and delivering energy from the very first second.
The Curtain is Always Up - So Act Like It
You don’t need a theater degree, and you don’t need 10,000 hours on stage to start using this tip today.
Just remember, there’s an invisible curtain between you and your audience. The moment they see you, your speech has already begun.
Even if there’s no spotlight, act like there is.
Smile.
Own it.
Enjoy the stage time.
Your audience may not be paying for a theater ticket, but they are paying with their attention. Earn it - before you even say your first word.
For over a decade, I’ve been helping people communicate at their highest level. Whether it’s a keynote, product demo, TEDx talk, or panel discussion, I can help you get your SHIP together - your SpeakerSHIP, that is.
I’m even writing a book on this, SpeakerSHIP, filled with simple, powerful techniques to boost your confidence, refine your message, and make sure you connect with every audience.
If you want to make your next talk shipshape, book time on my calendar. Let’s explore how to take your communication to the next level. 🚢🎤
